Comedy Vehicle

Most of my "real" friends have never heard of Stewart Lee. Or Comedy Vehicle. But my friends in the comedy scene look upon it with great reverence. And rightly so. When it was announced that the BBC had commissioned a second series, we couldn't contain our excitement. Well, we pretended we could so as not to embarrass ourselves by looking like excited girls in front of all the other "cool" comedy geeks, but we were all really wanted to whoop and dance with glee. And squeal a bit.

If you haven't seen it before, here is a great clip from the first series.

I was at a Soho pub waiting for my (then) iPhone hating friend - (oh it's all changed now since I wore him down and he finally got one. I shall forever cherish one of his texts to me: "I'm sorry I ever doubted you") -  when the news came through on Twitter that tickets were available. I immediately applied which was quite frustrating with a really crappy Internet connection and texted my friend Rob to do the same. A few days later, both of us had 4 tickets.

Tuesday:

So on the Tuesday I had arranged to meet Rob, Richard and Sir Bob at the venue. It's a great little working men's club in Newington Green called The Mildmay Club. (Is that patronising? I think it may be. But it's not meant to be.) We met a good hour before the doors opened and I ended up only 6 from the front. There was a bit of a worry when Rob Sedgebeer explained that SRO Audiences often give out a large amount of priority tickets so I had almost assumed we wouldn't get in and had thought of seeing Mark Steel at the nearby Hen & Chickens.

But the doors opened. We were in. All the people who couldn't be bothered to get to a previous SRO recording on time had their special pink wristbands, but we, the true fans, had the scummy green ones. We were directed by a lovely and incredibly camp man to the bar with a free drink ticket each. Luckily we were so close to the front as the queue for the bar soon became enormous, but I got a bottle of cider and we grabbed a table. There was a TV set up in the bar which was showing a live feed from the main room so I presume that the people who couldn't get in had the option of watching it here.

The barmaid was very efficient at collecting empty bottles. She approached my bottle and I explained there was some in there and went to rescue it. She decided to help out by filling up my glass and pouring the rest of it all over my iPhone. That's a new method of customer service I hadn't seen before. Anyway no damage done, and the priority people were called in. Soon afterwards the green wristband scum people (us) were called in and again, we needn't have worried as 60 of us were allowed in. (We were numbers 7-10)

Well I'm not going to put any spoilers in here, but Stew came straight on to do 2 x hour long sets with a break in between. There was no warm up act which was quite an unusual move for TV comedy, and it did mean that the audience were a little quiet for the first 10 minutes or so. Topics included his grandad's obsession with crisps, commenting at length on Adrian Chiles and Russell Howard's efforts to raise money for charity, moving to the countryside, visible otters (including a 15 minute one way conversation with an estate agent about how the show was going), a rant against emigrants (massive prawns!), and Mock The Week.

Stew, as in the first series, used an off stage cameraman to directly address the TV audience at home, the assumption being that they were hating the show and having to explain any difficult material to them. This worked a treat on the first series and there was a point where the cameraman was shaking with suppressed laughter which has to be a good sign. No warm ups, no retakes, just a great 2 hours of comedy with none of the usual faffing that is often the case with TV recordings.

We went to a pub the other side of Newington Green afterwards to wind down and headed off home. Now Rob had never seen Stewart Lee before and is coming again tomorrow. I'm going to tweet that I have spare tickets and if you are free and have any sense you will come along too.

Wednesday:

Bob and Richard couldn't make the Wednesday show, so I had two tickets to get rid of. I never thought it would be so hard to offer people free tickets to see Stew, but it was a bit of a trial. My brother was going to come but since his mobile phone stopped working it's been difficult to get hold of him, so eventually I managed to give my spare ticket to my friend Marco. he did tell me that he didn't "get" a lot of comedy so I was slightly worried as Stew isn't really an "entry level" comedian. I needn't have worried though because within 10 minutes of the show I was worried that at any moment he would accidentally spit a mouthful of beer over the person in front of him. (Incidentally I ended up sitting behind Sideshow Bob which I found rather typical and irritating.

So I got there again with plenty time to spare and was again right at the front of the queue. I had decided to wear my Richard Herring "Virgilio Anderson" t-shirt as some sort of subversive act. Marco and Rob joined me and we got into the bar rather quickly. Now, as I said, they have a TV set up in the bar so that anyone who can't get into the live recording has the option of watching it, but they had set out the seats in rows already which, bearing in mind how packed the bar was yesterday seemed like a mistake. However the bar seemed much quieter which was weird. However within 15 minutes it was heaving. They had been letting people into the venue much slower this time which certainly helped the congestion at the bar.

We got seats in the third row; the same row as yesterday, but this time towards the left and much more face on to where Stew was standing. This time, the camera he would address the viewer was stage front rather that stage left which was just in front of where we were sitting. The first part of the first set was a routine we saw yesterday about moving to the countryside, and this time his imaginary conversation with the estate agent took a rather different direction. Next was a discussion about how comedy today is different to comedy in the '80s: "In the '80s all the comedians hated the Tories, now they hate their electrical appliances", as well as a great routine about Al Qaeda, and how he finds them rude  - "I can't bear them."

This set was enlivened by 3 walkouts. Now I've since seen it reported on Twitter that people had stormed out, but in reality I think they were simply desperate for a wee. Stew however had a lot of fun with this with a very bemused response about having never, in all his days, seen people walk out of a TV recording. One was bad enough, but by the time the third guy tried to sneak out in a rather optimistic hunched way, the audience erupted with laughter. Stew later told us that he would try to include this in the final edit, as it would make a change form the usual Live At The Apollo cutaways where you see Lulu pissing herself! He finished this set with a song I wrote about in my last Stew blog about hack lines used by lazy comedians.

The interval came and went. Rather uneventful. Nothing to report.

The first half of the second set was his long story about his grandad and his love of crisps again. Stew seemed distracted and we could see the odd smile and smirk on his face. He stopped the routine for a few minutes and picked up an empty bag of crisps from the front row of the audience and said he had to move it as whenever he saw it he had to stop himself laughing. The end of the night saw a long story about how he thought he was friends with David Cameron when he was a student and how he organised pop groups for parties held by himself and other Bullingdon club members. This was a lower key set with fewer laughs and more poignancy but when they did come it was really worth the wait.

In fact you need patience when you see Stewart Lee. He delights in his silences, and pauses far longer than any "normal" comedian. This of course, as well as the anticipation of the punchline is often funnier than the punchlines themselves!

At the end of the show someone in the front row (not sure it was the same person with the crisps) dropped their glass, which smashed on the floor. Stew asked for it not to be cleared up so they could get a close up and asked the person to stay in their seats at the end to get a close up of their feet.

A very funny, unusual, odd and satisfying night.

Stewart Lee's Comedy Vehicle will be broadcast at some point in the future. I'm guessing spring time. Watch it!

Mick Karn 1958 - 2011

Mick Karn was "the best bass player in the world". Well, so I said when I was a teenager and had a best guitarist, drummer etc. Now I know these things can't be measured quite so simply, but to the grown up me, Mick was still the best bass player in the world.

The sound he made with the fretless bass was so unique, you could always tell when Mick was playing on a track. From Japan to Gary Numan to Kate Bush and his solo work, his technique made it sound although the song was melting through your speakers and it was very rare to hear Mick play anything obvious, The keys he chose were so unusual, so odd that instead of focusing on the singer, I would always listen to the bass lines, and there aren't many artists who would have that effect. I mean, who listens to the bass player more closely than anyone else in the band? (Apart from bass players.)

I never saw Mick live, but I was turned on to Japan via through my best mate Spencer at school, who moulded my musical tastes for years to come. Japan were often dismissed as Duran Duran wannabes, mainly because of their looks, but they were so much more than that. They were often criticised for copying Roxy Music, mainly due to David Sylvian's remarkable Ferry-like voice, but, to me, again, they were so much more. Japan never achieved the commercial success they deserved, splitting up after one hit single, just as Duran and Spandau were about to make it big.

It was announced in the middle of 2010 that Mick was suffering from advanced stages of cancer. I guess I assumed they would be able to make him better, and my hopes were lifted when reading that Pete Murphy and Karn were planning a new Dali's Car album any time soon.

Unfortunately this wasn't to be, and Mick died yesterday surrounded by his family. Not since Kurt Cobain in 1994 have I felt so affected by someone I never knew dying, and to finish this off, here is a Spotify song list featuring what I think is some of his best work.

Christ On A Bike

2010 was a good year for Richard Herring. A successful tour of "Hitler Moustache", with a DVD in the shops, a run of 10 live Collings & Herrin podcasts at Edinburgh Festival, the release of his book "How Not To Grow Up" as well as continuing with the As It Occurs To Me (AIOTM) podcasts and becoming a regular on 6 Music every Saturday morning with Andrew Collins. To cap it all , his almost record breaking score in Celebrity Mastermind. What will 2011 bring?

Well it's bringing us "Christ On A Bike - The Second Coming" which is currently running for 5 weeks at The Leicester Square Theatre before Rich takes it round the country till the middle of May.

COAB is a reworking of a show he did 10 years ago which features Herring's fascination with Jesus, although he is a confirmed atheist. I don't know how much has changed since then but it's a good opportunity for Herring to get the show on to DVD at last!

Rich has possibly booked the worst time of year to start a 5 week run in the West End. Christmas week, although good for Jesus, isn't so great for audiences, and the first week in January isn't ideal either as we've all spent our money. However I was hoping to go with a couple of mates tonight who ended up not being able to make it, so I went to the theatre by myself and just paid on the door.It also doesn't help sharing a week of the run with Stewart Lee, who I will be seeing on Wednesday. If Lee & Herring fans are going to go to one of the shows, then for Lee would be the obvious choice (with him being on telly and all that..), but I urge you to think again (You've had weeks to see Stew!)

Rich has mentioned on his blog that the audiences are not as large as he had hoped and this was confirmed tonight. There were 60 people in, and although that's a fine audience for a small comedy club, it's not ideal when in a 400 seat theatre.

The show started and Rich certainly didn't show any lack of confidence but did state at the start that sometimes when a show goes really well he would love to thank every member of the audience personally, and that tonight he probably could! The audience, to me, seemed rather quiet, although everyone did seem to be enjoying themselves. I imagine that some people, in a small audience in a big room may feel too self-conscious to let themselves go.

Rich On A Bike

The show is not as serious or hard hitting as Hitler Moustache, but the poster and the title would lead you to expect an offensive anti-religious rant, however this isn't the case. COAB is a light hearted and playful look at the Bible as well as comparisons between Jesus and Richard: "I'm not saying I'm the new Jesus. That is for other people to say". God's clumsy writing technique is criticised in a passage about the 10 Commandments, and Richard reads out his genuine application to become Pope (addressed to The Popefinder General, Vatican City). It hinges around a dream where Herring has a Tortoise and Hare style bicycle race with Jesus (I won't give any spoilers as to who wins but I'm sure you can guess.

A tape of his mum's voice echoes round the theatre "If you don't believe in Jesus then why do you spend all your time thinking and talking about him?" Just the thought of Rich asking his mum to record these words is extremely funny in itself!

After the break, Rich launched into his extremely impressive and hilarious genealogy of Jesus, all from memory, along the way asking searching questions about some "Boaz of Rahab" and others. He lets us into the trick of how he memorised these 40 or so generations and the secret is the most unusual noise I've heard coming from anyone on stage. It would make a very confusing ring tone.

The audience had certainly perked up by this point and seemed to be committed to a great night out. The show came to an end, though I could have happily listened to more. Grudgingly I had even agreed with Brian Logan about one supposedly weak line in the show, however what Logan failed to spot was that "Jesus" told Herring off for it towards the end.

By the time I left I had drank maybe one or two drinks more than I should have done and went on some rather lengthy twitter conversations which i was highly embarrassed about the next day, but I guess that's what happens when you go out in the afternoon then decide to go the the west end on the spur of the moment to see a show.

Christ On A Bike is a great night out. You could even bring your granny or your vicar. Londoners, get your tickets before he hits the road and come to The Leicester Square Theatre before the 22nd January or if you're one of those provincial types, check Herring's gig guide for details of venues. I don't give 'stars' and stuff in my little write ups, but if i did I would give the full amount of them (minus one as I don't like comedians to be too cocky!)

See you on Wednesday for Stewart Lee! Why not see Herring beforehand at the same venue and make it a Fist Of Fun special!

Are there...visible otters?

I had been looking forward to seeing Stewart Lee for ages. Ever since I saw him do an Edinburgh preview at Fat Tuesday back in July I was convinced that he is the best comedian on the circuit today. For those not in the know, Stew first came to prominence as one half of Lee and Herring who in the late '90s created both "Fist Of Fun" and "This Morning With Richard Not Judy". He seemed to disappear for a while before returning to national fame as the co-writer of "Jerry Springer The Opera" and will soon be recording the second series of "Stewart Lee's Comedy Vehicle".

I couldn't find anyone to go with me, however this was actually fortuitous. When I got around to booking tickets there were only single seats left which meant I could get one in the third row. I've been to the Leicester Square Theatre on a number of occasions, mainly for Richard Herring's AIOTM (aiotm!) as well as Herring's Hitler Moustache and The Collings and Herrin podcast live, so it was nice to see someone else here for a change, even if it was his ex comedy partner.

Lee arrived at 7.30 prompt and before he got on stage began berating the audience for being late, ordering them to sit down. He was using this current "Vegetable Stew" show to try out sets for his upcoming Comedy Vehicle series and was going to do 3 x 25 minute sets tonight.He is well known for giving his audience a hard time and making them work and tonight was no exception. He started slow. Very slow indeed. He pointed out that he knew that as it was Christmas that there would be some office parties in, probably booked by "Alan", an enthusiastic fan of his, while "Geoff" the boss and everyone else looked on bemused. He told the audience off for laughing at a joke he did about a single mother. "Do you think that was funny? I don't. I hate it. I've been told I could sell that joke to Tramadol Nights."

The first set was about moving to the countryside, and how awful the countryside is; the constant repetition of the words both frustrating and hypnotising the crowd. Most of this set was taken up with an imaginary phone call to an imaginary estate agent - hence the blog title: his friend who moved to the countryside had bragged about being able to see otters from the window - which turned into a conversation about how well or badly the gig was going, and that perhaps only a third of the people were enjoying it.The imaginary estate agent told Stew that he should have bailed out of the routine after the phrase "visible otters". This entire monologue went on for perhaps 15 minutes, with his back to the audience with the occasional sly look to see if more people were laughing.

The second set was about charity. Or, as Stew told us, it was to be about Adrian Chiles, but the BBC said this would have constituted a sustained attack, so he had to change the title. However this was still a sustained attack on Chiles before he moved on to Russell Howard, however without malice and extremely funny. This also focused on the amount of benefit gigs he does himself, which started as an estimate of 30-40 a year but by the end of the routine had slowly climbed to 80. This set was much more upbeat and climaxed with one of his trademark off stage off mic rants, shouting at someone moving about on the other side of the theatre when it was clear that if they "had ever seen anything ever" that this set was reaching a climax. Although Stew often claims that some sections of the room are quicker to react than others and tries to get the others up to speed I could see that tonight  it was certainly true. The guy sitting beside me looked terribly confused, disappointed, and possibly upset. I don't think he had been prepared by his friend who seemed to be having a whale of a time.

In the second half I decided to lean nonchalantly by the bar. I was being slightly annoyed by the grumpy guy beside me, and found myself standing beside the world's biggest Stewart Lee fan. Oh he was laughing alright. Laughing so hard at every line. Once he even slapped his thigh. However I liked him even though other nonchalant types were glaring at him.

Stew had given us a choice of topics for this final set: the difference between comedy now and comedy in the '80s or "some sort of political stuff about the government". The room was split, but my '80s comedy choice won, and Stew felt guilty that some of the audience would be disappointed and said he wished he hadn't given us a choice now: "This is why democracy can never work".

He sat on a stool for this set, clutching his guitar, explaining that having a guitar or a piano to use as a prop means that the audience would let him get away with substandard material and then explained the problems he has trying to get a gig at the O2 (I wonder who he could have been referring to?).

He explained that in the '80s all the comedians hated the Tories, and now all comedians hate their kitchen appliances before attempting to do a "Live At The Apollo" style routine about a toaster that either slightly warms the bread or burns it charcoal black. Naturally this went on for longer than you'd expect before explaining that the toaster was clearly broken and he should really take it back. he went on to remind us of the importance of keeping the receipt, although the staff in the shop shop he buys his electrical appliances from all know him so he might not need the receipt. "My observational comedy might not be very good, but at least you get excellent consumer advice." The show ended with a song on the guitar comprising of loads of very hack observational comedy lines which was rather pointed towards a rather popular current comedian. I'm not sure who, but the last two lines were "You're a liar. Your name is Michael..." but we never got to hear his surname.

I actually quite like Michael McIntyre (in small doses). I've said it now and it cannot be taken back. Deal with it. Though I do wish he's stop crowbarring accents into all his routines.

Great gig. It couldn't have been better. Maybe some more off stage off mic ranting but I'm just picking hairs. I grabbed a few pictures afterwards for this blog and on the spur of the moment bought his triple CD "What Would Judas Do?" which tells the story of the last week in Jesus' life from the point of view of this misunderstood disciple. I recommend it. You can get it from Go Faster Stripe as well as loads of other great DVDs from other very funny acts.

He finished his run on Saturday but has booked 5 more dates in the new year, so get tickets while you can. I'm up for it!

Oh I nearly forgot. One of my favourite lines of the night: "I hate Al Qaeda. I know its politically incorrect but I find them rude."

A Pleasant Surprise: Corporate Comedy Not Always Terrible.

So I am off to Highlight tonight with work colleagues for our Christmas party. This used to be a Jongleurs and is often spoken about with disdain by the comedians on the circuit that I tend to frequent. So when my boss announced that we were going there I looked as if I was pleased. I sort of was, but as she knows I'm a big comedy fan she wanted me to be pleased, so I did my best!

I started to worry about it. I have never been to a comedy show before when not everyone was a fan of the acts or comedy in general and have a few reservations.

First, not everyone will be that interested in the comedy. They are there for a night out with their colleagues, or perhaps there will be a rowdy stag or hen party with some idiots who think that heckling will be hilarious and will somehow add to the show, and that the acts will appreciate it.

Secondly, the doors open at 6 and there is plenty free beer available. (Well, for us anyway as our company is footing the bill.) This won't necessarily be condusive to paying attention later on. I was annoyed enough at the Richard Herring show on Wednesday whena table behind us quietly babbled amongst themselves during sets from Carl Donnelly and Eric Lampaert!

Then there is the fact that as a more corporate comedy club, will the acts have to broaden their material so that everyone gets it? Carl Donnelly said that this isn't necessarily the case and has seen Tony Law completely bamboozle the crowds with his unusual brain, and that the Highlight in Battersea can be extremely good.

Finally, will I know any of the acts and be hideously embarrassed by the drunken fools around me.

These are just my initial thoughts and I will continue the blog once I get back to compare my preconceptions with the reality. On that note, I'm off to trek through the snow and ice to Clapham Junction and if I get back without breaking a limb will continue the story.

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I'm back!

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You know what? It wasn't too bad! I didnt realise the venue was attached to a Walkabout so we met there and were treated to 10 free drinks tickets by our boss. Now it was tough getting through these but I managed it in the end.

Once we got up to the venue we took our seats. Looked like most people here were here as a company do. The compere was rather weak and , and the first act (didn't catch his name) was rather dire, with his rather dreary jokes about "Mussies".

It was fun when we told the compere that we worked for an adult chat line company and he didn't believe us. I think he got the wrong end of the stick, assuming we talked filth on the phone, but none of us put him right (apart from one of the shyer girls who made it clear she worked in admin!) He wanted a number to ring to prove we were telling him the truth and well done to my colleague who gave him the priciest 0906 number rather than the all too affordable 0871! Perhaps he spent too long with us, as I could see some of the other tables getting bored of the conversation.

Abandoman came on and pushed things up a gear. I had heard great things about them and when they asked us to find unusual things in our pockets and bags we held up ear plugs, asthma inhalers etc only for them to hold them in the air and build an improvised rap about them. Absolutely astounding. Go and see them when you can.. The atmosphere was fantastic and everyone had huge smiles on their faces.

The headline act, Jeff Innocent was also a turn up for the books. Looking like an England football hooligan he took to the stage and explained that people don't believe he s a comedian and I can see why people think that. He does look intimidating on stage and only an idiot would heckle. And yes indeed, some of our party threw some drunken heckles out (that didn't make much sense) that were very ably and comically batted away by Innocent. I only had to ssshhh people on a couple of occasions!

Now out of all the people there it seems everyone was there courtesy of their work. There were 2 couples that had paid by themselves to come in, but I think £25 is not a price I'd be willing to pay if I was coughing it up myself. The night was fun, but overpriced if you are buying your own ticket.

All in all, not the most hideous night I expected!

Comedy Gold

The Old Queen's Head is a pub even closer to where I live than The New Red Lion Theatre. As a lazy comedy fan, it's probably the handiest venue to go to. I've been there once before when it was so packed I had to sit on the floor right at the front of the stage, craning my neck upwards to see the acts. My neck could barely see their chests, never mind their faces, so I spent most of the time looking at comedians' crotches. This was even more noticable when 9'2" comedian Steven Merchant turned up!

This time was different. the lovely Annelie had booked us a table (quite handily near the bar) where I was joined by the lovely Richard and Rob. Richard had completely forgotten about this gig even though I had told him yesterday about it, and did finally manage to turn up (even though the cash in his pocket amounted to a pound less than the entrance fee) and was allowed in to sponge the extra quid from Rob.

We did hear beforehand that Mark Steel couldn't make it as he was stuck in snow in Kent. This was a shame (especially for Mark) as he was the only comedian on the bill I hadn't experienced before, and I was very keen to see him , and I did plan to have a picture of himself and Herring together for this blog and refer to him as Andrew Collins throughout just to see if anyone would notice.

Carl Donnelly is a comedian I have seen before at Fat Tuesday, and more recently on Mock The Week and he was our compere for the night. His free flowing style suited this role and was happily engaging charmfully with the audience, which ended up with Aussie Top Trumps where he picked random categories to compare the 2 Aussies in the audience to find out which was best.

Eric Lampaert was the first act to perform. I had seen him before (with Rob) at a warm up for Richard Herring's "Christ On A Bike" show before Edinburgh, alongside Joel Dommett (who ended up naked... anyway that's beside the point...) and he had a real Eddie Izzard feel to him. Semi-improvised, and able to take ideas and run with them, pointing out his Edinburgh reviews comparing him to a shark and had the audience on side after a while. Well worth seeing. He did wonder later on Twitter if ending with new material was really a good idea!

However both Eric and Carl's sets were spoiled for me by the table at the back. Although the comedians' couldn't hear them, they were quite happily chatting amongst themselves. I glared a few times, and eventually as this continued into Eric's set had to ask them to keep the conversation down. I had assumed in my head that this would end up with a big unseemly argument, but they seemed to take it on board and I didn't notice them again. Hurrah!

(Oh Christ, I'm going to Highlight (ex-Jongleurs) on Friday. I just remembered. Although Carl did tell me in one of the intervals that they can be good nights. I'm still slightly concerned.

We then found out via Twitter (of course) that Richard Herring had been having travelling problems. Flat battery. I began to wonder if this gig was doomed. Thankfully he jumped in a cab and I didn't have to do his set as he suggested. Unfiortunately he will not be able to eat tonight. The taxi driver's family will do just fine however.

Sara Pascoe was on next. I saw her at All Day Edinburgh and although I enjoyed her set, there was something that didn't grab me. Don't get me wrong, she was good, but there were quite a few better acts on the bill. However tonight she nailed it. Absolutely storming set and I will 100% see her again.The mixture of strength and insecurity she showed was spot on and she won the crowd over easily.

Then Rob had to leave to go to work. I bullied him into apologising to Herring for walking out before he had even started his set. Just for my own amusement really! Sorry Rob.

The evening ended with Herring, and I'm not going to go into the details of the show here. I've done that enough in the past. However the place was loving him, and the regular routine, but now incorporating elements from Hitler Moustache and Christ On A Bike went down extremely well. The laughs were coming so often I couldn't hear the table at the back at all! He threw in an improvised section when a punter arrived upstairs with two pints in his hand who seemed about to step across the stage to go to a table,  speculating that he may be a new comic and debating what his catchphrase may be. Herring has a solid routine, but as he has said himself, it may be time now to write new material for it. Some of it has to stay, such as the "sky potato", "seven year old girl hands", and "signs for homosexuality at school" routines, but some could be trimmed a little. Perhaps use less of the childhood stories. However this doesn't mean dropping the "Men Of Phise" classic!

Incidentally, while Richard has been (jokingly) asking to be credited for sections of Andrew Collins' "Secret Dancing", maybe he should give credit to Andrew for writing the "Icarus Myth" line? In fact Andrew should insist on it!

Anyway, all in all, a fun fun night. 4 great acts. No filler. Comedy Gold is a great night. This along with Fat Tuesday, The Fortnight Club and Sunday Comedy at The New Red Lion Theatre makes me glad to be an Islingtonian.

(Still thinking about the Frankie Boyle travesty from last night. Should I end this blog on a rape joke?)

All Day Edinburgh - a benefit for Shelter

All Day Edinburgh is the brainchild of Michael Legge, who announced on Twitter a few weeks ago that there was an amazing gig coming up. We were all on the edge of our seats for days until "All Day Edinburgh" was revealed to the world. This was to be a benefit in aid of Shelter, the homeless charity and the aim was to recreate the Edinburgh Fringe in a single day. Some great acts were announced with a couple unable to be revealed as they were THAT GOOD ! Michael had already told me after the Los Quattros Cvnts gig that there was to be a big opener and a big closer, and he wouldn't say any more. However, later in the evening I did hear the name Stewart Lee and got quite excited. I then found out that there was no Stewart Lee, but I was still excited!

The day was to begin in a rather traditional (for me and Neal) Phoenix way with Sunday lunch at The Explorer. This was probably the best idea we had bearing in mind the endrance test of booze we were about to undertake. We were joined by Graham, Hitch, and Sir Bob, as well as Woolhouse, Sedgebeer and Vicky H. Vicky seemed to take great delight in giving me one of her now infamous (to me anyway) "boob hugs". I won't say any more about that.

Before we go any further, all the crappy out of focus pictures were taken by me on my crappy out of focus phone. All the good ones were taken by Neal Peters and the entire set can be seen here.

Acts that had been revealed for ADE included Tony Law, Penny Dreadfuls, Pappys, Dan Antopolski, Paul Sinha, Sara Pascoe, Nick Helm, Hour Of Telly Live, Tara Flynn, Mat Ricardo, Jim Bob, Alex Horne, Colin Hoult,  Storytellers, Caroline Mabey, Robin Ince & Michael Legge, and The Trap.

Vicky Hook

Hitch

For me this was great news as all the comedians from that list that I have seen I have enjoyed greatly, and there are a few on the list that I have never seen such as Helm, Pascoe, Penny Dreadfuls, and Pappys that I have never seen but only ever heard good things about. And for a man of my age, the chance to see Jim Bob is not one to pass up. We ALL loved Carter USM in the 90s you know.

Michael Legge

Michael warmed us up with a nice anti-Edinburgh, anti-homeless and anti-comedian rant before the first act Nick Helm came on. I had missed Nick at the opening night of Sunday Comedy at the New Red Lion Theatre At first I was a little unsure about him as he opened with a lot of shouting. but once he moved into his first song about a girl he likes having a hot boyfriend who made her look fat, his vulnerability started to come through. Watching Nick made me glad for once that I didn't have a front row seat as his intensity was pretty intimidating, dragging one lad on to stage to sing a sing as well as bringing a girl on stage where he spoke to her through a tin can telephone. When she was asked about her favourite canned food, she told him it was mushy peas to which he responded that they were much better than having whole peas in a can due to all the draining involved. In fact all the draining was draining. Excellent stuff.

Next up, was An Hour Of Telly Live who are a duo comprised of Margaret Cabourn-Smith and Zoe Gardner who perform some telly for us. Live. Michael was less of a compere, and more of a fan when he introduced them and Robin Ince had tweeted when he was on his way that he hoped he hadn't missed them. A great fun show, well worth seeing, even if only for the line "Your teeth are cunts".

Caroline Mabey  was up next with a routine all about breakfast with an accompanying slide show whch discussed "Breakfacts" and "Breakfantasties". The self-importance of breakfast describing itself as the most important meal of the day was discusssed as well as it inpinging into the other meals due to the rise of the all-day breakfast. Caroline is quite unique in her delivery, giving us a mixture of straight forward jokes along with her surreal narrative.

Next up was Interval #1. I've had intervals before and this was a fairly standard one. I bought a beer, had a cigarette and kind of hung around. Not bad. But I wasn't ready for an interval at this stage and could have done without it.

Robin Ince

After the rather adequate interval came Robin Ince & Michael Legge with their "Pointless Anger, Righteous Ire" show. Robin started by reading one of his clever books before being interrupted from the off-stage Michael, asking what the fuck he was doing? I've seen these guys perform both seperately and together many times and would recommend you to see them if you can. It's nice to see Robin abandon his usual book / science / philosophy based shows and concentrate on screaming "cunt" at the top of his voice. Definite shades of Mayall/Edmonson here (which is a tribute - not a criticism!) This set had an surprisingly touching end to it where Robin explained that All Day Edinburgh was actually his idea, however Michael had actually gone ahead and organised it, and sincerely asked us to give him a round of applause. Michael didn't like this one bit !

Sara Pascoe was up next who explained that due to her poor reviews at Edinburgh her confidence had been knocked and was not going to do material from that show, but she gave us some new material, a particular highlight being her graphic novel based around a "pornography" she has written. I can't remember all the details, but there was a lollipop lady, and ambulance driver, a dead child and a minotaur...

You have probably read about The Trap before on this blog, as they are 75% of Los Quattros Cvnts. I have always liked these guys, and I'm not a huge fan of sketch comedy, but their podcasts are always rambling, surreal and hilarious. The first sketch was an attempt to do hard hitting satire that was always interrupted by some rather cheesy show music. They went on to do a sketch involving Jeremy and Paul wearing fez's (always funny!). The Two Nevilles. This was a long routine that parodied old music hall duos and I wasn't really sure where it was going until Dan asked them how long they had been working together and they said it was so long they could do the routine backwards. Dan insisted they did. This was where the real comedy happened as this was a palindromic sketch which turned the charming if not especially hilarious sketch into quite an offensive routine that The Two Nevilles looked more and more shocked as the routine evolved in reverse. This was the best sketch The Two Ronnies never had (the clue was probably in the characters' names!) Brilliant stuff, backed up with the next sketch which comprised solely of the alphabet and nothing else. Very very funny guys.

Juggler, Mat Ricardo was up next.. I've seen clips on Youtube where rather than pulling a tablecloth off, leaving the crockery in place, Mat does the trick in reverse. However, this has to be my first apology of the blog as sometimes when you haven't made the most of the first interval, you have to make an interval of your own (I was dying for a wee, a fag and a drink) and I'm afraid on a long day when you have to pick an act to sacrifice, then I'm afraid it's often the juggler. Sorry Mat !

Interval #2 was good. Much better than the first one. It was so good I was late back and missed the start of Alex Horne and his Horne Section. This was yet another great act involving some audience interaction from Alex whilist his band played in the background. An improvised version of "One Wild Night" by Bon Jovi went down well even though I'm not sure if anyone has heard the song, or indeed if it exists. Great joke about 'Chat' magazine, with one audience member sayig her friend wrote a household tips column for it. Alex was confused why a French magazine about cats would have this! The set ended with a rather unexpected morris dance with a near disastrous end when all balance was lost.

I've never seen Pappy's before, but always heard good things. I was a little unsure whether the gloriously shambolic set they performed was scripted or whether that's how they always are, but got a lot of laughs and the build up to the three musketeers reading the football results was fantastic!

Chris Addison

What needs to be said about Chris Addison ? I've seen him a couple of times before, and he is ALWAYS on top form. He started with a bit of a microphone problem, and it seems that along the way he destroyed one. So a stuttering start, but he went on to be the funniest act of the day! Rants about the Daily Mail and a great line about being so non-sexist that he "actually married a woman. And in many ways, so did she"! Rants about Ugg boots, The Pope and The Daily Mail followed, as well as a true story about a woman being offended by the swearing in a golf club. She complaned to the committee and the rules were changed - so that women weren't allowed on the balcony! FIVE STARS !

I was so overcome by Chris that I needed more booze etc so apologies to Storytellers for missing almost their entire set. I'm sorry, although I got back in time to hear a story about joke theft committed by Stephen K Amos !

Dan Antolpolski was as awesome as you'd expect updating his classic "Hedgehog" joke to ask "Warthogs. Why can't they share the warts?" No narrative, just joke joke joke. He went on to explain the racial heritage of his children with pie charts, and confused the audience by questioning if you should use the word "hair" or "hairs". this went on for so long it definitely out "Mars Bar"ed Richard Herring! He talked about his friendship at school with George Osborne (a Stewart Lee style exaggeration?) and his suspicion that he likes retarded porn. His set included another of the best lines of the day: "I can't help myself. Like Stephen Hawking at a buffet" He ended the set with a rap about his laser. That isn't as scary as it sounds!

Star of "Gutted", Colin Hoult was next. He played an army veteran (Andy Parker) who promised us he would not be doing any of that "poofy stuff". He told us about his money making schemes including drawing TMNTs*. He has also written a screenplay based around Hostel where he has a "poofy bloke" and a "fit bird" being killed horrifically by Mr Giggles, finally being defeated by an "army bloke" This is the second time I've seen him play this guy, and would love to see more of his work. Great stuff.

*TMNTs - Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Paul Sinha sets out his stall from the beginning explaining he is gay, Indian, and ex-doctor and a quizzer. very funny guy who talked about his appearance on radio (never telly, always radio) to debate with the deputy leader of the BNP. He then went on to speculate which member of Pappy's he would do first !

Tony Law

Tony Law came on after the interval and bamboozled everyone with his unusual thoughts. I've seen Tony a few times and always throws in plenty new material and he seems to freeflow ideas as they occur to him like a mroe surreal Eddie Izzard in cowboy boots. After a couple of minutes everyone was going with him! His discussion on panda prostitution and his workshop on comedy instructing people to use animal sounds and revolutions to make comedy gold,

More music next from Tara Flynn who performed 3 songs from her Big Noise show that I already blogged about here. I was very happy to hear "The Fog From The Film The Fog" as well as her song about Irish sexuality containing my favourite lyric of the evening "You custard bastard. I'm your custard whore"

Have you noticed that each act is getting less and less written about them as this blog goes on? Sorry but my fingers are tired, the blog is too long and my memory is fading...

Sean Goldsworthy (aka Paul Litchfield)

The legendary Sean Goldsworthy (Paul Litchfield from The Trap) delivered some extremely arousing erotic poetry. With lines such as "Her breasts looked right back at him" and "Her ass was toned like paperweights filled with pictures of other women's asses" I would imagine everyone, even all the women, in the audience sported stiffies.

Jim Bob

Carter USM's Jim Bob, (yet another star of Gutted) came on to perform a few songs for us including the Carter classic "The Only Living Boy In New Cross". It was hard to concentrate with Michael Legge dancing out of the corner of my eye! This is yet another performer I will definitely be seeing again.

Hitch and Legge have a lovely snog

The Penny Dreadfuls were soon on to complete the show and again, like the poor Mat Ricardo I had to sacrifice them for more booze, fags and weeing. Sorry about that again... Michael brought the gig to a close thanking all the acts for performing only to be trumped by his lovely wife Muki shouting Michael's name which resulted in a standing ovation which, again, Michael didn't like at all, prompting him to bolt from the stage straight to the bar.

Sincerely though, a great job by Michael for organising this, and looking forward to next year's already. After the gig, Hitch and I went to The Rocket on Euston Road and were soon joined by Woolhouse. A more perfect ending to the night I couldn't imagine.

Then Hitch threw up in a bin.